Things That Scare the Bejeezus Out of Programmers

Things That Scare the Bejeezus Out of Programmers 641

Posted by Soulskill on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @03:33AM from the it's-just-a-matter-of-code dept.

itwbennett writes "Software developers are, by and large, a cool and analytical bunch, but there are a handful of things that strike terror in their hearts. Phil Johnson scoured developer forums looking for an answer to the question: What's your biggest fear as a programmer? The answers clustered into 5 broad groups ranging from being forced to learn or use a specific technology to working for and with incompetents. What's your biggest fear?"

Things That Scare the Bejeezus Out of Programmers

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getting raped at your work seat (Score:4, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @03:35AM (#44173637)

getting raped at your work seat

Ghosts (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @03:41AM (#44173659)

also, Spiders and Bees

Stupid people (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @03:56AM (#44173727)

They're impossible to code for, or cope with.
"Enter date"
>cat
"This value is invalid"
"Hey your software is broken! It doesn't stop me typing "cat" in a date field!"
What did it say?
"value is invalid"
There you go then!
"But it didn't stop me typing it!"
Because it assumes you are not a moron? You're right, it is "broken"...

stab people in the face (Score:2, Funny)

by Barryke ( 772876 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @04:04AM (#44173763) Homepage

"But it didn't stop me typing it!"
This really brought up memories.. (source http://bash.org/?4281 [bash.org] )
<Zybl0re> get up <Zybl0re> get on up <Zybl0re> get up <Zybl0re> get on up <phxl|paper> and DANCE * nmp3bot dances :D-< * nmp3bot dances :D|-< * nmp3bot dances :D/-< <[SA]HatfulOfHollow> im going to become rich and famous after i invent a device that allows you to stab people in the face over the internet

Things that scare developers, (Score:5, Funny)

by mjwx ( 966435 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @04:08AM (#44173787)

Snakes,
Loud noises,
Social contact,
Drinks machine being out of soft drinks and/or chocolate,
Google being down,

Velociraptors (Score:5, Funny)

by Arancaytar ( 966377 ) writes: <arancaytar.ilyaran@gmail.com> on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @04:09AM (#44173799) Homepage

(obviously)

Re:I fear... (Score:4, Funny)

by Xest ( 935314 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @04:39AM (#44173901)

Is that still around? I thought when the recession hit most companies realised that one of the first things you should cut is pointless money and time wasting bureaucratic process and just hire people who know what they're on about and have real actual common sense whilst firing those that don't.
Please don't tell me now that the global economy looks like it might be improving again soon that it's going to make a comeback?

Re:Bad multithreading (Score:5, Funny)

by jimshatt ( 1002452 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @04:40AM (#44173905)

3..2..1... Phew! I might otherwise have replied even before you commented. That worked out well!

Re:getting raped at your work seat (Score:5, Funny)

by ciderbrew ( 1860166 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @04:49AM (#44173945)

Still working at EA?

Re:Biggest Fear? (Score:5, Funny)

by fahrbot-bot ( 874524 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @04:54AM (#44173965)

Velociraptors [xkcd.com] - That's why I never use a "GOTO" ...

Re:getting raped at your work seat (Score:2, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @04:57AM (#44173979)

Hmmm...I work with some very lovely ladies so I'll have to disagree on this one.

Re:getting raped at your work seat (Score:5, Funny)

by K. S. Kyosuke ( 729550 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @05:51AM (#44174173)

Debasement in the basement?

Grues. (Score:5, Funny)

by will_die ( 586523 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @06:11AM (#44174235) Homepage

Nothing more fearful then the worry of having grues attack you as you go into a dark server room.

Forgetting the 'where' clause (Score:5, Funny)

by Fidel Perez-Smith ( 2971717 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @06:36AM (#44174313)

Running an SQL update statement without a where clause and seeing '47,982 rows updated'.......bonechilling

Re:Relevance to programmers? (Score:5, Funny)

by Nerdfest ( 867930 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @07:20AM (#44174503)

The "specific technology" one is a big one though. As someone who has been forced to use a lot of IBM "technology", I'm of the opinion that there is nothing to fear but WebSphere itself.

Re:Stupid people (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @08:31AM (#44174971)

They're impossible to code for, or cope with.
"Enter date"
>cat
"This value is invalid"
Tomcat here. What's wrong with having a date with a cat?

Re:Doesn't anyone remember FDR? (Score:3, Funny)

by g0bshiTe ( 596213 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @10:03AM (#44176007)

Why'd you bring mythological creatures into this discussion next you'll be talking about unicorns and pumas.

Re:Doesn't anyone remember FDR? (Score:4, Funny)

by greg_barton ( 5551 ) writes: <greg_barton@yaho ... m minus math_god> on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @10:43AM (#44176479) Homepage Journal

I'm Afraid of People who Unnecessarily Capitalize.

Re:getting raped at your work seat (Score:5, Funny)

by Dareth ( 47614 ) writes: on Wednesday July 03, 2013 @11:13AM (#44176857)

Ba Zynga?!

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Things That Scare the Bejeezus Out of Programmers 641

Things That Scare the Bejeezus Out of Programmers More Login

Things That Scare the Bejeezus Out of Programmers

getting raped at your work seat (Score:4, Funny)

Ghosts (Score:5, Funny)

Stupid people (Score:5, Funny)

stab people in the face (Score:2, Funny)

Things that scare developers, (Score:5, Funny)

Velociraptors (Score:5, Funny)

Re:I fear... (Score:4, Funny)

Re:Bad multithreading (Score:5, Funny)

Re:getting raped at your work seat (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Biggest Fear? (Score:5, Funny)

Re:getting raped at your work seat (Score:2, Funny)

Re:getting raped at your work seat (Score:5, Funny)

Grues. (Score:5, Funny)

Forgetting the 'where' clause (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Relevance to programmers? (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Stupid people (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Doesn't anyone remember FDR? (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Doesn't anyone remember FDR? (Score:4, Funny)

Re:getting raped at your work seat (Score:5, Funny)

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