I like PHP. It's made me a shitload of money over the years, so I'm genuinely looking forward to all the derogatory comments about how "PHP is teh shitty language!!1!"
I'll read them sitting in a fully paid-off, 4-bedroom home that was bought and paid for by PHP.
Is PHP the greatest language in the universe, or even on this block? Nope. Does PHP have lots of sharp edges? Yep. Do many of the functions appear to be named by crack addicts with head injuries? Yep. Do I give a shit? Nope.
Anyway, have at it boys, tell me how awful it is. (I'll try not to rub my private parts with handfuls of $100 bills while you're venting, lol.)
Sou herb plantation owners got rich by exploiting slaves. Just because you can make money doing it doesnâ(TM)t make it good.
The sooner php is killed, the better the world will be. Itâ(TM)s a sorry excuse for a platform, built with no forethought or care. And the people that use it are hacks.
Sou herb plantation owners got rich by exploiting slaves.
Instant fail. Are you really comparing slavery with PHP?
Come on, honey, you can do better than that. Maybe discuss with your psychiatrist why you're so triggered by someone being successful with a language you don't like.
In the meantime, I have to go rub some more $100 bills on my crotch.
Perhaps you forgot to check that argumentum ad populatum is still a logical fallacy in 2021.
My company makes up some of those 80% powered by PHP, I make my salary supporting PHP web sites and coding PHP code myself, I even like some of the overall language, and PHP happens to be the first language in which I coded any non-toy programs.
Yet it is still pretty much THE shitty language. A primer on how you DO NOT create a programming language, from security hell to just absurd language features that trip you on
I think you're misinterpreting his post. He makes it quite explicit that he thinks PHP is hot garbage in his last points:
Is PHP the greatest language in the universe, or even on this block? Nope.
Does PHP have lots of sharp edges? Yep.
Do many of the functions appear to be named by crack addicts with head injuries? Yep.
Do I give a shit? Nope.
He's not saying it's a good language, he's saying he has no reason to hate it, because it gives him a roof over his head.
So? Windows powers 90% of PCs out there. Obviously it doesn't suck? Intel powers the vast majority of PCs out there, it doesn't suck?
Just because something is stupidly popular doesn't mean it doesn't suck. PHP may power most websites out there, but there are plenty of reasons why it sucks. And the bigger problem is because of certain design decisions, there are multiple wrong ways to do things, and the wrongness is now etched forever in stone through StackOverflow and other copy-and-paste code sites.
Sorry, but I couldn't hear you over the sound of $100 bills being rubbed on my crotch.
PHP may power most websites out there, but there are plenty of reasons why it sucks.
Hey dumb ass, where did I ever claim that PHP didn't suck? Oh yeah, that's right- I didn't. Got any other strawman arguments you'd like me to set fire to?
and the wrongness is now etched forever in stone through StackOverflow and other copy-and-paste code sites.
Damn, it's a good thing that that never happens with any other language on Stack
While I feel the same way, I also resent the fact that of all the languages that have become immensely popular for web stuff, it's PHP. I'm sure we'd all be bitching if Wordpress had been written as a JEE Java application because of Java's verbosity, but it probably wouldn't have half the security issues.
Being a PHP developer doesn't just mean coding in a weird language with a lot of shitty bits, it also means becoming a sysadmin for the most part, as you're constantly having to patch every single websit
you're constantly having to patch every single website you maintain thanks to some Wordpress developer forgetting momentarily that "0" is the same thing as "", allowing a third party to run arbitrary bitcoin miners on your server farm and grab your ssh keys.
I've never had this issue, probably because I write most of the code that goes on my sites, and also because I try to retrofit code that didn't originate with me with some extra sanitizing and hardening.
WARNING TO ALL PERSONNEL:
Firings will continue until morale improves.
Hmmmm (Score:3, Funny)
PHP haters, take note:
"PHP powers 80% of all websites."
Okay code snobs, let the hate flow through you!
I like PHP. It's made me a shitload of money over the years, so I'm genuinely looking forward to all the derogatory comments about how "PHP is teh shitty language!!1!"
I'll read them sitting in a fully paid-off, 4-bedroom home that was bought and paid for by PHP.
Is PHP the greatest language in the universe, or even on this block? Nope.
Does PHP have lots of sharp edges? Yep.
Do many of the functions appear to be named by crack addicts with head injuries? Yep.
Do I give a shit? Nope.
Anyway, have at it boys, tell me how awful it is. (I'll try not to rub my private parts with handfuls of $100 bills while you're venting, lol.)
Whatever knobend (Score:2)
Sou herb plantation owners got rich by exploiting slaves. Just because you can make money doing it doesnâ(TM)t make it good.
The sooner php is killed, the better the world will be. Itâ(TM)s a sorry excuse for a platform, built with no forethought or care. And the people that use it are hacks.
Re: (Score:2)
Sou herb plantation owners got rich by exploiting slaves.
Instant fail. Are you really comparing slavery with PHP?
Come on, honey, you can do better than that. Maybe discuss with your psychiatrist why you're so triggered by someone being successful with a language you don't like.
In the meantime, I have to go rub some more $100 bills on my crotch.
Re: (Score:3)
Perhaps you forgot to check that argumentum ad populatum is still a logical fallacy in 2021.
My company makes up some of those 80% powered by PHP, I make my salary supporting PHP web sites and coding PHP code myself, I even like some of the overall language, and PHP happens to be the first language in which I coded any non-toy programs.
Yet it is still pretty much THE shitty language. A primer on how you DO NOT create a programming language, from security hell to just absurd language features that trip you on
Re: (Score:2)
I think you're misinterpreting his post. He makes it quite explicit that he thinks PHP is hot garbage in his last points:
He's not saying it's a good language, he's saying he has no reason to hate it, because it gives him a roof over his head.
Quite honestly, I know where he's coming
Re: (Score:2)
Finally, someone who gets it.
Do I love PHP? Yes.
Is it because it's such an outstanding language? Nope.
Is it because I've made a borkload of dough with it? Yes.
That's why I love it, not because it's a great language.
Poor "impaledsunset" above got so triggered he practically wrote a book to refute me, when there's nothing to refute, lol.
No argument whatsoever- PHP is a hot mess. And I love it.
Re: (Score:2)
Too long, didn't read.
Anyway, all your whining is pointless. I didn't read much of your post, but I probably don't even disagree with most of what you said.
PHP is a terrible language, and it's made me tons of fucking cash. That was my point.
Anyway, what were you saying? Something something bad language...? I kind of got distracted by the shitloads of money it's made me.
Re: (Score:2)
So? Windows powers 90% of PCs out there. Obviously it doesn't suck? Intel powers the vast majority of PCs out there, it doesn't suck?
Just because something is stupidly popular doesn't mean it doesn't suck. PHP may power most websites out there, but there are plenty of reasons why it sucks. And the bigger problem is because of certain design decisions, there are multiple wrong ways to do things, and the wrongness is now etched forever in stone through StackOverflow and other copy-and-paste code sites.
Re: (Score:2)
Sorry, but I couldn't hear you over the sound of $100 bills being rubbed on my crotch.
PHP may power most websites out there, but there are plenty of reasons why it sucks.
Hey dumb ass, where did I ever claim that PHP didn't suck? Oh yeah, that's right- I didn't. Got any other strawman arguments you'd like me to set fire to?
and the wrongness is now etched forever in stone through StackOverflow and other copy-and-paste code sites.
Damn, it's a good thing that that never happens with any other language on Stack
Re: (Score:2)
While I feel the same way, I also resent the fact that of all the languages that have become immensely popular for web stuff, it's PHP. I'm sure we'd all be bitching if Wordpress had been written as a JEE Java application because of Java's verbosity, but it probably wouldn't have half the security issues.
Being a PHP developer doesn't just mean coding in a weird language with a lot of shitty bits, it also means becoming a sysadmin for the most part, as you're constantly having to patch every single websit
Re: (Score:2)
you're constantly having to patch every single website you maintain thanks to some Wordpress developer forgetting momentarily that "0" is the same thing as "", allowing a third party to run arbitrary bitcoin miners on your server farm and grab your ssh keys.
I've never had this issue, probably because I write most of the code that goes on my sites, and also because I try to retrofit code that didn't originate with me with some extra sanitizing and hardening.