Perl Haiku Poetry Contest 306
ActiveState writes "Tell us why you love Perl. ActiveState is pleased to announce the ActiveState Perl Haiku Poetry Contest. Do you love Perl as much as we do? Then prove it with your passion, creativity, and wit! Categories include Best Haiku Poem Written in Perl and Best Haiku Poem About Perl. All entries will be featured on our website. Winners will be selected by ActiveState's Perl development team. Prizes will be awarded for the top three entries in each category and include licenses for ASPN Perl featuring Komodo Professional Edition, and cool ActiveState gear.
The deadline for entries is 12:00PM PST, February 8, 2004. Winners will be announced on February 10. Full contest rules are also online.
Good luck!"
fp.pl? (Score:5, Funny)
content-type: haiku/firstpost;
or die "i fail it";
Re:fp.pl? (Score:5, Funny)
Alas, it wasn't to be
Try python next time
Re:fp.pl? (Score:2)
Re:fp.pl? (Score:4, Funny)
it is powerful
it extracts and it reports
and it's a language
Re:fp.pl?(with line breaks) (Score:2, Funny)
Doubtful, gibberish perhaps.
Debugging, -> brain fail.
only a VB programmer would think that (Score:4, Funny)
the comparison is loose
just like your mother
Re:only a VB programmer would think that (Score:5, Funny)
rots the true programmer's mind
study machine code
Re:fp.pl? (Score:3)
Some say it is a language,
but we know the truth!
perl_parser.pl (Score:2, Insightful)
A language that can't
be reduced to BNF
just should not exist....
or
Algorithms vote
how to parse ambiguous
constructs! Why, oh why!?!
If you don't understand what I mean, try to write a program that parses the perl language itself. Apologies in advance for the massive head trauma.
Re:fp.pl? (Score:2, Informative)
Re:fp.pl? (Score:2)
As keeping warm in winter.
Switch to PHP.
Flaming newbies (Score:2, Funny)
I just wanted to know how
to run CGI
More flaming (Score:5, Insightful)
Capital P E R L
not acceptable
Re:More flaming (Score:2, Funny)
a day when Slashdot would combine Perl and haiku...
Revel in now 'cause it will never come again.
That is until next week when it gets duped.
Right, bring it on. (Score:4, Funny)
Slashdot posts again
Now I am scared
Re:Right, bring it on. (Score:4, Informative)
All about Haiku [toyomasu.com]
Re:Right, bring it on. (Score:5, Informative)
Re:Right, bring it on. (Score:2)
Hm, why would I take literary advice from someone who can't spell 'write'?
Also:
>Small miscalculations in syllable counts
You don't count 'onsetsu' or syllables, you count 'haku' or beats... not that the average Japanese man in the street seems to grasp the distinction these days.
Re:Right, bring it on. (Score:4, Funny)
Slashdot is read in office
one must tpye fats, eh?
Re:Does it also need to have a seasonal reference? (Score:3, Informative)
Yes, it should contain a kigo, a season-related word with specific connotations (the seasonal connection is often pretty obscure). This is the biggest problem with haiku in English -- there are no kigo. Some people have suggested that a strong word should be picked to fill the role of the kigo in an English haiku.
Actually, the kigo and the kiri -- a pause that comes usually but not always after the 5th or 13th beat -- are perhaps more characteristic of haiku than the 5-7-5, which is broken quite often e
And a transformation in the last line! (Score:5, Informative)
The point here being that after the first two lines the reader would have assumed that is was summer, and made a mental image in green and blue summer colors, but after the last line, he has to revise that picture radically. (My own sucky translation of my faulty recollection of the Swedish translation of the originally Japanese haiku, so please don't take the example as such too seriously, but it illustrates the point, anyway.)
In a way it works a bit like a joke: first you set something up, and then, at the end, you deliver the punch line.
And this of course makes it more interesting to try to write haikus, because no matter how you count your syllables, you really don't have an awful lot of them to achieve all of that.!
Re:And a transformation in the last line! (Score:2)
It's a popular form, but really it just has to contain a nature theme, otherwise it's just another senryu poem. What I learned in grade school and some purists still demand, is not just a nature theme, but a season theme, and it actually has to contain a season word (change "Over the white ice" to "Over winter ice" and
Proper Haiku should also have kigo (Score:2, Interesting)
If you have read Cryptonomicron by Neal Stephenson, you'll notice that all of the haiku included contain the kigo as well.
Re:Right, bring it on. (Score:5, Funny)
would haiku writer miss more
written part or math
Re:Right, bring it on. (Score:2)
Haiku in English
Is not Japanese
Re:Right, bring it on. (Score:2)
Middle Line Is Borked
Syllabically too short
and hangs to the left
(notably, there are several other forms of Haiku other than 5-7-5)
Re:Right, bring it on. (Score:4, Funny)
Slashdot posts again Watch the haiku deluge flow I cover my ears
Re:Right, bring it on. (Score:5, Funny)
Everyone now sees your shame
How shall I end this?
Other flames (Score:5, Funny)
Same person behind the name
Uri, do you care?
the real contest (Score:5, Funny)
Re:the real contest (Score:5, Funny)
perl trix are for unix kids
try vb perhaps?
Re:the real contest (Score:3, Funny)
haikus; yours was the best, dude
Super Funny. End
Sub
close enough for vb
Re:the real contest (Score:2, Funny)
Perl runs just fine on Windows
Thank you anyway
Re:the real contest (Score:2)
and correct me if i'm wrong, but you have to pay?
Re:the real contest (Score:4, Informative)
Re:the real contest (Score:2, Interesting)
I want a proper Bash prompt
Cygwin is my friend
Re:the real contest (Score:3, Interesting)
Coy module on CPAN [cpan.org]
too hard (Score:5, Funny)
i can never remember
how many syllables you are supposed to put in each line
Re:too hard (Score:5, Funny)
There once was a poet named Dan
Whose poetry just didnt Scan.
When asked why
Dan replied
"its because i try to fit as many words into the last line as I can"
Re:too hard (Score:3, Funny)
Re:too hard (Score:2, Funny)
There once was a man from Japan
Whose poems would rhyme but not scan.
When asked why this was
He said "It's because
I try to fit as many syllables into the last line of each poem as I possible can."
As for Haiku:
Hash - bang - path to Perl
Print words to screen: hello world
Camels hate winter.
There. The first two lines almost rhyme, it's 5-7-5, and I got a seasonal reference in the last line.
Re:too hard (Score:3, Funny)
whose limericks aren't worth a penny.
Her technique was sound,
but she always found
whenever she tried to write any
she'd end up with one line too many.
Re:too hard (Score:2)
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Taint check your scripts,
Or 1 w1ll 0wn j00
There was a perl hacker named Ray,
Who wanted the time of the day.
He pushed and he popped
Shifted and chopped
Till tomorrow was somehow today.
More like pseudo-Perl (Score:5, Informative)
Re:More like pseudo-Perl (Score:3, Informative)
Erm, apparently there are 2 catergories, one the Haiku must be a valid perl program, and the other is a Haiku about perl (doesn't actually have to contain any perl). There is no category where you must use perl keywords and it doesn't have to be a valid program.
How do you pronounce.... (Score:5, Funny)
one more (Score:3, Funny)
See the State of the Onion
Go to Wall.org [wall.org]
Reminds me of Corn Flakes (Score:5, Funny)
Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl
Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl
Lamness filter! Damn! Now how do I get past it? Don't know. Just give up.
Troll?!?! (Score:2, Funny)
Maybe that's South African
For "really hard drugs"
Wow, we sow the seeds,
Then nature grows the seeds, and
Then we eat the seeds
What do we have here?
All of Ms Kendall's knickers
That need a good wash
Stickiest bogey
Made by Toxteth O'Grady
Of the USA
The world's stupidest
Bottom-burp is Vyvyan?
No, it says Rik here...
Crop rotation in
The 14th century was
Widespread after... John
And, for a limited time (because I'm at work), a haiku rendition of the theme song!
Once in a lifetime
Comes lov
Troll? (Score:2)
What a darling fascist bully-boy.
Don't mod if you don't get it.
IMDB [imdb.com]
Boomshanka.
You forgot the all-important seasonal element (Score:2)
Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl
Perl Perl Perl Perl Snow
The seasonal reference has been an integral part of haiku since Time Immorial. The explanation has been an integral part of the lameness filter since the mid-90s.
Re:Reminds me of Corn Flakes (Score:2)
Are too young for The Young Ones
But I got your joke
Perl in the real world (Score:5, Funny)
The damn program broke today
Can't grok my own code
mmm..... (Score:5, Funny)
each version incompatible with the last
god how i luv it
My haiku actually does something (Score:5, Funny)
print dollar sign underscore
close curly bracket
Re:My haiku actually does something (Score:5, Funny)
Missing opening bracket
And semicolon
Re:My haiku actually does something (Score:4, Informative)
semicolon does not need
to be in the code.
System maintenance (Score:5, Funny)
delete $problems{$_}
Life should work like that
why perl should not be used to write software (Score:5, Funny)
I was just telling my boss
that Perl is bad.
The language is great.
Expressiveness *and* power.
bitch to maintain tho.
and they write haiku
in this programming language?
boss, I rest my case.
Re:why perl should not be used to write software (Score:5, Funny)
In Perl, to do it. But all
Are unreadable.
Mmm, interpreted languages! (Score:5, Insightful)
C program runs so quickly
Perl not done by spring!
On the other hand...
Perl script written fast
Overflows still plague C code
After many moons.
Haiki rules (Score:5, Informative)
Here's what the Oxford Dictionary folk have to say:
The Japanese haiku must include kigo (season word). This is a convention in the Japanese art of haiku. But English haiku has no such word. Moreover, composers of English haiku are not required to strictly observe the 17 syllable rule. The Japanese haiku is written in a single line, but the English haiku is divided into three lines.
It would have been nice if their rules could have had some tips for pedants like me. Do they demand 5/7/5? I am guessing not. If they wanted to get all traditional on our asses they could demand 17 kanji symbols, and I don't know how you can code:in Kanji.
Re:Haiki rules (Score:3, Insightful)
White noise buries the Line Noise
Why not APL ?
Re:Haiki rules (Score:2)
$x =~ s/sc/suc/g; $x =~ s/fe/5/g; $x =~ s/l/lla/;
$x
Translation: "will suck your laundry right now"
Re:Haiki rules (Score:2)
in Kanji.
I don't know how to do it in Japanese, but you can certainly write Perl in Chinese [autrijus.org]. It should be possible to modify that module to permit compilation of the works of Basho...
Hailku defined? (Score:5, Interesting)
Seems that I am slightly wrong. The 5-7-5 syllabal grouping is accepted to be a Japanese convention where those breaks match the structure of that language. In other languages the the 5-7-5 doesn't fit as well, so you seem to be able to do what you want.
Also the Haiku is generally considered to be an expression of direct experience with out attached emotion. So similie, metaphor and anthropomorphism do not see, to be well regarded.
Two links that I just found and read are:
The definition of Haiku [pacific.net.sg] by Alexey Andreyev.
Another Attempt To Define Haiku [ahapoetry.com] by Jane Reichhold.
-----------
Is there another word for synonym??
Re:Hailku defined? (Score:3, Funny)
In other words, perhaps...
Contest is a sham!
They don't define a haiku!
We're not mindreaders!
My Entry (Score:5, Funny)
Readability... (Score:5, Funny)
Larry Wall's language
is not obfuscatory.
Just need more coffee.
Re:Readability... (Score:2)
nostalgia (Score:2)
was the language of choice for
lazy programmers?
Ultimate Haiku (Score:4, Funny)
Then seven, then five again
Blah, blah, fucking blah...
Ah, Perl (Score:2)
Alas the guard has changed
Type safety matters
Damned haiku... (Score:5, Funny)
syllables ain't enough to
express a complete
Haiku error messages (Score:2)
From the module's documentation:
When a program dies
what you need is a moment
of serenity.
The Coy.pm
module brings tranquillity
to your debugging.
(Note that the documentation for Coy is, you guessed it, in Haiku form)
Java Haiku (Score:5, Funny)
public static void main(String
args[]) { System.out.print(
"too much preamble " +
"this intro is so common " +
"why can't it be short? "
)}; }
}
Here (Score:5, Funny)
Perl compiler debugs you
Quick mention of summer
Definitely not love... (Score:2)
No one shall understand,
A write-only language.
Just another Perl song (Score:2)
i love perl but ... (Score:4, Interesting)
physically located in the United States or Canada (a "Qualified Individual")
eh.
Re:i love perl but ... (Score:2)
We the furryeingners
would beat USian asses fast
with our Perl wisdom.
Maybe it is time
to outsource haiku contests
to India,China.
Many many types (Score:5, Funny)
Taint checks I did ignore
Open shell command with bad pipe
My hard drive now gone
A happy haiku
Met a girl on chat
Perl script calls me when she's online
I will score soon now
And self-completing plus poetic Perl, Perl, do you use
To compile your own hai-kus
Regexps fun to abuse
self-listing haiku? (Score:5, Interesting)
my $haiku_lists_itself; print
`cat $0`
Here's a real challenge:
Write a self-listing haiku
without such "cheating."
Is it possible?
I have no idea of how.
I would guess it's not.
Yes, it's possible. (Score:4, Insightful)
Example (not mine):
#!/usr/bin/perl
$s = q<print "#!/usr/bin/perl\n\$s = q<$s>;\n$s\n";>;
print "#!/usr/bin/perl\n\$s = q<$s>;\n$s\n";
Gee, that makes my head hurt...
Good luck making a true 5-7-5 haiku out of that, though.
The question is: (Score:3, Insightful)
Some random haikus (Score:2)
A frostbite incurred during
Nuclear winter
In George Bush's mind
This is a valid haiku
Nuclear fits in five
I'm programming Perl
My program is just one line
Took five years to write...
I wrote an A.I.
Only used two lines of Perl
Output is cryptic
I hate Perl (Score:5, Funny)
punctuation factory
Result? Perl. Good Luck...
open bracket, bang
colon backslash asterisk
oops, forgot a quote
Finally, finished!
Undefined variable.
Camel book flies far.
How do I do this?
Answer: "Easy, just use perl"
Programmer gets punched.
Re:I hate Perl (Score:2, Interesting)
no obfuscator's needed
to protect the source
Re:I hate Perl (Score:2)
I'm not pushing for
I'd rather eat poo.
Timing (Score:2, Interesting)
Haikus only really work with syllable timed languages. Having said this, US Perl is probably less strongly stressed than other Perls. Perhaps, there could be a Perl limerick contest for those whose Perl is more strongly stressed?
Political Haiku (Score:2)
for ($vote=0; $vote<=1; $vote++) { print "$remember[$easy]"; if ($easy eq "0") { print ", "; } $easy++; }
$be_heard = "Vote!"; if ($remember = $vote) { print "\n$remember[$easy] $vote $be_heard\n"; }
my attempt (Score:2, Interesting)
study $ARG; for (;time = defined;) {}
do{ not (wait or sleep) };
spamassassin (Score:2)
Perl-based Spamassassin
allows bogus Habeas
One more for haiku aficionados (Score:2)
A haiku contest
Pretentious assholes/experts
Perl crowd rejoices
Oh, yeah, almost forgot -- it's f*cking freezing.
silence (Score:2)
I will obsolete your job
Silence infidel!
Re:Question.... (Score:1)
syllable
Re:Perls before swine (Score:2, Funny)
His humor is real nerdy
But still, he's married
Re:Apologies in advance (Score:2)
Was penning his next Perl book
When Intel "penned" him.
(important: always use the !@#$% Preview button...)
Re:Apologies in advance (Score:5, Funny)
Like there's one 'l' in Larry
RTFM, Newb.
Re:Crazy Australians (Score:2)
"use Acme::Lingua::Strine::Perl;"
to reach out to him.