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Perl Programming

Lighter Side of CPAN 66

bleechack writes: "Looks like Perl.com is fully ready for the release of Lord of the Rings with this week's "Lighter Side of CPAN"."
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Lighter Side of CPAN

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  • Support (Score:2, Informative)

    by NovaScorpio ( 127710 )
    Personally, I think it's not only quite funny, but a great way to get people involved and interested in perl who might have only glanced upon perl before.
  • by ukryule ( 186826 ) <slashdot&yule,org> on Thursday November 01, 2001 @11:56PM (#2510909) Homepage
    So to sum up this article, if you add this at the top of your Perl programs:
    use Symbol::Approx::Sub;

    use Coy;
    Then not only will your Perl be even less decipherable than normal Perl code (wow!), but the errors you get from it will be hidden in lines of poetry! No self-respecting programmer would have it any other way ...

    Now, it's back to debugging my program for me:

    -----

    Two old men encounter
    beside a pond. A swallow
    flying. Two trout.
    -----
    Lao Tse's commentary...
    Execution of ./new.pl aborted due to compilation errors.

    ("The Way of Mysterious Compiler": line ???)
  • by Nevrar ( 65761 ) on Thursday November 01, 2001 @11:58PM (#2510913)
    There's a few syntax errors in that geekcode, but here's the decoded (valid) geekcode from the article [ebb.org]

    --
  • Matlab (Score:4, Interesting)

    by sasha328 ( 203458 ) on Friday November 02, 2001 @12:29AM (#2510964) Homepage
    I remember when I used to use Matlab, there was a funtion called "Why". It used to spit out these silly answers. It somehow made using Matlab slightly less tedious.
    This is just like all the hidden easter eggs in programs written by most programmers. (The built in screen saver in some versions of Word does not count.)
  • by cancrman ( 24472 ) on Friday November 02, 2001 @12:56AM (#2511011) Homepage
    I thought it said "The Lighter Side of CSPAN". What a strange /. topic....
  • Perhaps the author should get in touch with the wacky ophthalmologist responsible for this site [tripod.com] and pick up a few tips on making indecipherable humor err...decipherable.
  • From seeing the trailer it looks like there might be a 1/2 decent movie to come out in 2001. Best I've see so far is Zoolander and that doesnt say much.
  • by Grim Metamoderator ( 178266 ) on Friday November 02, 2001 @02:33AM (#2511141)
    ...that Perl itself was evidence that Larry Wall had a sense of humor.
    • Unfortunately, it turns out that he's like one of those annoying five-year-olds who thinks a joke gets funnier if you repeat it over and over again. He's been telling this joke for about 14 years now.
  • The synchronicity machine clicked, and the name of Eris adorned his prose. The author is one of us without any doubt. Funny I followed a Perl link, being a wannabe Pythonista and all that cal, but the Discordian reference made it all blissfully clear in a very obscure manner - the usual tool of the old girl, eh? All hail Discordia!
  • Does it really seem like a good idea to have our computers guessing about what we mean? To be honest, they're not smart enough for me to trust them with that kind of authority quite yet. Until my computer can actually construct a useful PERL routine and explain its reasoning to me, I don't really want it guessing which one I meant by my typo...
    • is it any better to have Microsoft guessing (or telling) us what we want? Actually computers already tend to guess what we mean on a regular basis. That's what spell/grammar checking does.
    • I don't see anyone claiming that it's a good idea. Simply that it's something that can be done (and therefore was).
  • by mir ( 106753 ) <mirod@xmltwig.com> on Friday November 02, 2001 @03:18AM (#2511201) Homepage

    I can't believe the article did not mention ACME::Bleach [cpan.org] which just bleaches your program. Run it once and your code magically disappears... but still runs!


    ACME::Buffy [cpan.org] is similar, except your program is turned into a Buffy mantra that can be chanted or executed.


    In fact the whole ACME [cpan.org] name space is reserved just for silly and incredibly useful modules.

  • by Marcus Brody ( 320463 ) on Friday November 02, 2001 @07:24AM (#2511493) Homepage
    This is my favourite pointless?? perl module:


    Quantum::Entaglement [perl.com]


    And who said that quantum computers a centurys away?? You can get started on your 386 right now, courtesy of CPAN!

    Also, about that eliza chatbot: there is an easier way to get started (you may have seen this in this months linux journal, non?):


    $ emacs
    esc
    shift-X
    doctor

    And there you go - a psychotherapist built right into your text editor. Perfect for those times when that fscking bug makes you want to give it all up...


    Anyway, next time someone complains about MS bloatware being so cheeky that they included a flight sim in a version of Excel, I shall point this out!

  • by Anonymous Coward
    I thought that said "The Lighter Side of CSPAN." Boy, was I disappointed when I clicked on that!
  • I've known for a long time that Perl is a funny language. After all, its creator, "Larry Wall", definitely has a sense of humour.

    The proof of this, of course, is right here [stonehenge.com], and here [yahooligans.com].

  • ...you might be better off investigating the Time::Human module by Simon Cozens. This creates person-friendly descriptions of a time, transforming the excessively precise 00:23:12.00 into a positively laid-back ``coming up to 25 past midnight.''
    I've surfed around CPAN, google, and Simon Cozens' home page but can't find this module. Can anybody point me to it?
  • The Song (Score:4, Funny)

    by TeknoHog ( 164938 ) on Friday November 02, 2001 @10:23AM (#2512075) Homepage Journal
    $tune = $Aerosmith['Pink']

    Perl, It's my new obsession
    Perl!~/\?/
    Perls on the neck of your lover
    'coz Perl gives you stuff to discover

    Perl at the bin in my /usr
    Perl, cos you are no luser
    Perl, it's the coding with passion
    cos() today it just goes with the Slashdot

    Perl, what a mess at first sight

    Perl, with the regexps so wild
    Perl, gets the lowest of nice


    And I think all these bugs are going to multiply no matter what we hack tonight.
    - you could be my dromedary
    'coz Perl is a lingo so scary
    Perl likes its vars with the dollar
    it's curled but you don't ever tell 'er, yeah
    Perl, what a mess at first sight...


    And I think all this code is going to self-rewrite no matter what we eval() tonight.
    I want to be your regex
    I wanna doc you in latex
    Perl on the screens that we key on
    Perl, do I hate that one python, yeah
    Perl, what a mess at first sight...


    And I think all this code is going to multiply no matter what we eval() toniiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

Almost anything derogatory you could say about today's software design would be accurate. -- K.E. Iverson

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